totally and completely off topic!

So yeah...this has absolutely nothing to do with WoW. If you were looking for helpful tips and analysis of instances and raids you were at the wrong place anyway because I have no idea! If you were looking for helpful and sage advice about playing your character you have again come to the wrong place. Being that this is the wrong place for any helpful WoW information, I suppose I shouldn't worry about being off topic anyway. Now, if you were looking for advice on eating a gnome you'd recently caught or beautiful haiku poetry from the various denizens of Azeroth you have come to the right place on the wrong day. On to my totally non WoW topic.

I'm currently putting together a ppt presentation about alternative medicine (CAM). I am in occupational medicine and work for a very large company. On occasion they let me out of my cave and ask that I give informative presentations to our employees. I have done diabetes, cardiovascular health, cholesterol, health maintenance, cancer and more.

My intention is not to endorse CAM, but to discuss it. To make our employees aware of what CAM is and how it may affect their health, particularly if they are taking medications or treatments for a chronic or acute condition. I was hoping to write a balanced, non-judgemental presentation that left people with an understanding of various theories in health as well as an awareness of their own health and that just because something is "natural", it doesn't mean it is automatically safe. The problem I'm having is the non-judgemental part. I am a raging empiricist and generally view CAM as a bunch of crap. I was telling friends and family that zinc for colds was a load of crap long before studies came out confirming that. Magnet bracelets are a bunch of crap. Colon cleansing is a bunch of crap. Alkalinated water is a bunch of crap. Those things that suck impurities out of your feet are a bunch of crap. Titanium bracelets and necklaces are a bunch of crap. Chiropractics.....crap. Yep you heard it here. The problem is that I think most CAM is a bunch of crap. If traditional Indian (ayurvedic) medicine worked, why do people not live as long. Why are lifespans up in nations that practice western (allopathic) medicine? Why have lifespans generally increased as western medical science has improved. Traditional medicine/treatment has been around for thousands of years, yet it has been with the advent of allopathic medicine that people live longer.
Does this make me a judgemental bastard? Probably. Does it make me a less effective medical provider? Maybe. Mind you I am never judgemental with my patients. I need to know if they are using any CAM and if they think I am going to scold them for it, they would certainly not reveal anything. I do try to be open minded and generally my feeling is (and me response to patients is) if something works for you, go ahead and use it (provided it's not bad/negative). If your chiropractic treatments are making you feel better, why would you stop? As long as it doesn't interfere with the successful treatment of other conditions, I'm okay with it. Hell, even placebos have a relatively high success rate!
So, I don't believe in most CAM therapies, but I understand the importance of being non-judgemental and keeping an open mind. How do I close down the pessimist long enough to create and give a successful presentation? Any advice on doing things you don't agree with or believe in? The topic is importance enough (about 38% of ppl report using CAM therapy) that it needs to be done, but I need to do it well and without alienating those that do believe!

A shameful admission...

Yes, it's true I'm a huntard fan. I am enjoying the hell out of my hunter. I can take on 4 mobs, solo elites and destroy people in battle grounds. It's like being an enhance shammy (except for the destroying people in battle grounds part!). Actually when I was leveling as enhance, I kicked the crap out of people who tried to gank me. But my battleground survivability sucked at 80...or maybe it was my skills. But I digress. I am loving my hunter! I'm at 46 and starting to battleground in the 40-50 bracket. I prefer not to enter until 46 because I don't want to handicap my team too much! I do have 5 heirloom items, so that could be one reason for feeling powerful, but I must assume that people get upset at hunters because things are easier for them. Tank pet and fire away. Easy. Fun. Fast.
That being said, I still have alot to learn. In PvE and PvP. I have so many things I forget. Cooldowns, traps, tricks, etc....hopefully by 80 I'll be ready to get into one of your random heroics and get labeled a dumbass and put on your blog!
Making money is nice too! I had mentioned before that money is coming in quite well. My LW is bringing it in quite nicely, as is my cook. SP and AP foods sell quite well in stacks of 5! Food alone brings in 200-400 gold per day. I'm not all that much into making gold and I'm quite sure that I'm sucking at it quite powerfully, but for now I am happy with the amounts. I will have enough by the weekend to pay for artisan flying on 2 of my toons. Either that or I'll put it into an IGA (individual goblin account) and see what happens.
Depending on wait times, I'd like to level to 50 in battlegrounds alone. We'll see how that goes. Any suggestions for glyphs? I'm using the mark of the hunter and the ice trap one. Didn't seem to be any others that compelled me to purchase them! Yes, I could look it up but I'm a hopeless, useless social who relies upon others to help me. Must be one of those damn ape sub-routines.

ramble on

Yes, it's the title of an outstanding Led Zeppelin song. No, nothing about this post will relate in any way to Led Zeppelin. I'm just rambling....verbally. Or not really verbally..as I'm actually typing....rambling thoughtfully? Not sure. Anyway.

Who watched "Lost" last night? I had the feeling after that episode that they had no idea where things were going and were just looking for filler content. It's not that I wasn't interested in the back story of Jacob and the man in black aka the smoke monster, but explaining where they came from created the same set of replacement questions. "okay, that's where Jacob came from, and the man in black is his brother, but where did the lady come from and who put her there and what is the light????". Answering a question and simultaneously creating more does not clarify things. Anyway, we shall see. It was fun to see how Jacob's brother became the smoke monster anyway!

Klepsacovic loves to respond to Gevlon's ridiculous ideas (don't get me wrong, I love reading Klep's responses!). In Gevlon's world, it is black and white and there is no inherent right or wrong so you do whatever works best for you regardless of the effects on others. Obviously wrong. Many examples in nature show animals working together for the betterment of the group. I still read Gevlon for laughs, but his thoughts are so inflexible and theories so fundamentally wrong at their core that they have little effect on me other than making me chuckle. I think in today's post Klep was saying that you can't tell a person's RL "self" by looking at their "in-game" self. True to some degree says I. However if someone is a racist, sexist asshole in game, I can assure you that they are that in RL. My understanding of Klep's comment is that he feels this way as well. A hardcore organized raider could be a total spaz in RL. A stand in the fire guy could be a brilliant astro-physicist. But again, if you're an ass in RL, you will be an ass in game and vice-versa.

Speaking of assholes, when did everybody get so F'n rude? Was I sleeping for a decade and woke up in a-hole land? Turning on your signal to change lanes is an invitation for the driver next to you to speed up and close that space you were hoping to move into. Apparently it's okay to spit wherever you want. Apparently just because one car is waiting with turn signal on, it doesn't mean you can't slide in and grab that space for yourself. Used to be that whoever was closest to the curl of the wave had the wave. Maybe a gentle "going left!" for the guy trying to take off ahead of you. Nowadays every asshole within paddling range takes off on the wave. All that seems to matter now is that I get mine and screw the rest of you. Sounds like a goblin world.

Gnomochi-a delicious dessert

In honor of Keredria, I thought I would offer you this delicious dessert that gets it's name from the flour(mochiko) used as well as the flavor(gnome extract) that provides it's unique and delicious taste. For our non-gnome munching friends, the recipe can easily be changed by removing the gnome extract. I had previously introduced you to a recipe that used gnome extract. Again, it can be purchased at better vendor stands and inns, but an industrious orc can go out and find his own with a little work. Again, remember that as you twist the gnome to get the extract, you must hold the gnome by it's legs and shoulders. If you twist by the head or feet, they may pop off quite easily as gnomes are quite fragile. If you are Forsaken or Blood Elf, you can find a Tauren friend to help you get the extract. Now, on to the recipe!

Ingredients
1 pound mochiko (glutinous rice flour)
2 1/2 cups white sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 cup butter, melted
3 cups whole milk
5 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup sweetened, flaked coconut
2 tablespoons gnome extract

Directions
1. Heat your hearth to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9x13 inch baking dish.

2. In a medium bowl, whisk together the eggs, vanilla, gnome extract and milk. In a separate larger bowl, stir together the rice flour, sugar, and baking powder. Pour the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients, and stir to blend. Mix in melted butter and coconut. Pour into the prepared pan.

3. Bake for 1 hour in the preheated hearth. Cool completely, then cut into squares to serve.

A relatively simple recipe that yields a delicious culinary treat that will have your tastebuds
dancing! Enjoy!

Monday Haiku

Today I was going to present a haiku of my own invention, but I came across this lovely piece attributed to a kobold named Snigglesnot. Now I had no idea these interesting creatures possessed the ability to think on an artistic, creative level, but I think you'll find after reading this that they do. This piece provides a fascinating glimpse into a creature many of us have encountered but few have stopped to consider.

Dig dig dig oooo gold!
Dig dig dig dig ooooo silver!
You no take candle!

Amazing. Inspiring. Looking into the mind of a creature full of hope and dreams.....just like you or I.

Weekend is coming!

Addendum-Don't eat the gnomes you find near Gnomeregan. They taste awful.

So this weekend I'm planning on continuing my hunting ways. She has hit 40 and I really had a blast leveling the last few levels in BG's. I did some questing too, but alot of my xp for the last 3 levels was through BG's. I got the next level of riding, so it's nice to be a little faster. Not to mention her war chicken is very sexy!
One piece of advice I can offer to all new players, is, don't bother buying new gear as you move up. Save your money. I remember doing this with my first toon. As soon as I'd level I would be off to the AH to find out if there was some new item I could get. Leveling in PVE, upgrades are negligible. Of course I'm not saying you should be wearing your level 12 crap at 40, but just that quest rewards and maybe a few AH items should get you through no problem. Generally speaking, I may pick up a few items during each 10 levels. If I'm at 40 and still wearing a level 30 chest, I may check the AH. The truth is (in my world anyway) that those upgrades don't make a huge difference. Now, in PvP they do. If you plan to PvP, you should have some upgraded gear. I generally have travelled to the AH around level 17/27/37 for some upgrades. I usually don't PvP until then anyway.
Anywho. I finally got my LW cow at max skill and am making some decent money at that. I'd like to get artisan flying for her. PLan for the weekend is daily LFD for everyone, make some money and level that hunter. Time is limited, but I'd like to get 5 levels on the hunter before Monday. Fat chance, but I shall try! I'd also like to drop by my SAN toon and see what those monkeys are up to, but we'll see. My guild is setting up an ICC 10 on Saturday which I'd love to do but their raid times are like 2-3 pm my time. Not so great for a parent/husband/homeowner. Kinda peak responsibility time! Maybe I'll give wife my debit card and send her to the mall with the kids. I live on the edge! Anyway, hope all have a good weekend and get to work on those Haiku's for Monday!

Are gnomes evil?

Well? Are they? Yes. Quite simply....gnomes are definitely evil. And this is how I know.

First, they are very short. As we know, there was a study written many years ago by a brilliant scientist and philosopher, Sir Randolph of Newman. After months of exhaustive research, Sir Randolph came up with some very interesting conclusions. In reference to gnomes:

They got little hands Little eyes
They walk around Tellin' great big lies
They got little noses And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

This very clearly demonstrates the perverse little abominations that gnomes are.
Sir Randal then continues...

They got little voices
Goin' peep, peep, peep
They got grubby little fingers
And dirty little minds
They're gonna get you every time

It's now very clear that through his studies, Sir Randolph has revealed that gnomes are the real scourge upon our world. Once punted, they should be consumed (or weighed down and placed in a very deep body of water) immediately.

Some observations I have made in my travels. Gnomes waddle. Skunks also waddle. Skunks are smelly and bad. Therefore gnomes are also smelly and bad. Sarah Palin (of Stormwind...) has a high pitched, highly irritating voice. Sarah Palin (of Stormwind) is bad. Gnomes have high pitched, highly irritating voices. Therefore, gnomes are are bad. Gnomes shift around alot on their feet as the stand. This is a sign of sneakiness. They are hiding something.

Now that we have established how horrible gnomes are, let me clarify one thing. They are delicious. Please do not be confused on this point. Gnomes are not good alive, but quite fantastic when thoroughly dead (and cooked...or raw if that's your thing).

Pro Tip: When preparing gnome, try using a spice rub. Kneading the meat once you've covered it with your rub allows the spices to work into the flesh and softens it up as well. Let it sit for at least 30 minutes with the rub as you knead intermittently. Enjoy!

Hunters and Gold.

Yep, Thats pretty much been my focus in recent days. My poor warrior has fallen back into disuse. My shammy and spriest still get almost daily attention. My dk gets a little something a few times a week. Most of my time is going to the hunter. She's sitting just below level 40 now. I've risen a few levels just through battlegrounds. PvP is really fun with the hunter. Concussion shot is my best friend (that frickin' thing used to drive me crazy in PvP on other toons!!!). And ice traps! It's amazing how many people will stand and fight your pet. It's also amazing how many people will continue to follow you despite seeing you place something "invisible" on the ground. I have a ways to go in terms of skill, but it feels nice to see my name at the top of the list for damage! Often times I'm having enough fun just fighting that the outcome is secondary. I'm sure Gnomey would kill me with his little bare hands if he could. Which brings to mind this question. Female blood elf vs a gnome....hand to hand. Who wins? I say the belf.

I'd like to get back on my revolting little gnome and see how everyone in SAN is doing. It's been over a month since I logged on. With limited time and an inability to stay focused for very long, I'm afraid I have neglected that part of my WoW world. Anyway, hello to the three of you who read my senseless musings.

Did I say gold? Yes! I'm finally making some. I've struggled somewhat finding a way to make money. I'm not poor or anything, but training another artisan flying would wipe me out. I'd like to hit at least 10k gold at some point here! Then I'll get artisan flying for my cow. Borean leather has been so cheap lately that I've been buying it up like it was going out of style. I turn it to heavy leather and trade it for arctic furs to make the leg armors. I have a ton of frozen orbs from LFG. Leg armors usually sell for 160-170 gold. My spriest also makes up batches of the dragonfin and firecracker salmon dishes (AP and SP) for sale. 5 usually sell for an average of 45 gold and they're quite cheap to make. I haven't really found a niche for my enchanter or tailor (both leveled). My JC and inscriptionist aren't leveled yet. Either way, I'm making close to 600-800 gold per day with 10-20 minutes effort. Any suggestions here?!

Tuesday Recipe- Pickled Gnome

Hello all, time for another delicious recipe! Of course, as you expected gnome is the dish of choice here. There are so many ways to prepare gnome. All of them delicious. I really encourage you to try different recipes. Explore! Let your taste buds soar!

So, for today I have decided to treat you to a popular snack beloved by the trolls of the Eastern Kingdoms. Pickled gnome is a tasty treat that children love to munch on after getting home from school and adults love equally well as a yummy pick-me-up after a long day of punting gnomes.

On to the recipe!

Pickled Gnome
3 cups gnome slices (I prefer thin cuts from the thigh, flank, or butt!)
10 li hing mui (optional)
1 cup rice vinegar
2 cups granulated sugar
1/4 cup coarse salt

Place gnome slices in a clean glass jar with li hing mui, if using. Combine vinegar, sugar and salt in a non-reactive saucepan and bring to a boil. When sugar and salt are dissolved, remove from heat and cool to lukewarm. Pour over gnome slices. Cover and let stand for 24 hours, then store in ice box.

Now, many may be aware that some humans love this dish but using green mango instead of gnome. If you are a fruit eating freak who enjoys the taste of a pickled slice of green mango over a thin, fresh slice of gnome thigh….that is up to you! Either way, enjoy!

Next week I will continue honoring our Eastern friends with a delicious dessert using gnome essence and a sweet rice flour! See you then!

Monday Haiku

As many of you know, Gnomes are not high on my "most loved beings of Azeroth" list. I suspect that very few of you knew that I had a "most loved beings of Azeroth" list. Well, I do. It is a work in progress (and it is, not surprisingly, quite short). Gnomes are not in the top 10. Neither are pig-men or plainstriders. As you may have guessed from some of my posts, blood elves are not particularly high on said list either. However, in the name of art and education and fairness, I have decided to submit this weeks haiku from a self-described literary genius from the too clean city of Silvermoon. A blood elf by the name of Alistair "Snootypants" Goldenlocks. And yes, I added the "snootypants" part...heh heh heh.

Golden light sparkles
From skin so magnificent
My word, I'm gorgeous

Some have at times suggested that blood elves can be a little arrogant and self absorbed. I try not to spend too much time around them as the perfumes that the males of the species smother themselves with makes me retch, so I'll refrain from commenting on that. Here is Alistair's piece anyway. Read it. Take from it what you will. Until next week, I remain.....green (cuz I'm an orc see).